“A man, who was telling his friend about an argument he'd had with his wife, commented, "Oh, how I hate it. Every time we have an argument, she gets historical." The friend replied, "You mean 'hysterical.'" "No," he insisted, "I mean historical. Every time we argue, she drags up everything from the past and holds it against me"” (sermoncentral.com).
Keeping a record of wrongs is not a problem limited to marriages. It can plague workplaces, classrooms, and church buildings. Grudges are nourished. Forgiveness is withheld. And if it goes on long enough, relationships are destroyed. What is so tempting about bringing up the past anyway? Perhaps we feel empowered by having such a potent weapon in our arsenal. Maybe we think we hold the trump card that allows us to win any argument. Whatever our reasoning, its wrong.
The Bible tells us that true love “...does not take into account a wrong suffered” (1 Corinthians 13:5). I like how the NIV renders this verse: “...it keeps no record of wrongs.” Nothing good is gained by keeping a running list of offenses committed against us. In fact, to do so evidences a lack of love on our part. How much better it would be for us to follow the lead of our Heavenly Father, who promises to forgive our sins and remember them no more (Jeremiah 31:34, cf. also Isaiah 43:25).
Make no mistake -- it stings to be hurt by someone. It’s natural to want to keep a record of such wrongs and to hold those transgressions over the heads of those who have mistreated us. But we are called to live above our human nature. No, it is not easy. But we must release the past before we can truly live in the future that God wants for each one of us. No one benefits when we start getting historical.
God blesses those He forgives by not taking their sins into account (Romans 4:7-8). Let’s bless other by doing the same.
God loves you!
Mike
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